Hello Mr. Bush," a heavily accented voice says. "This is Santa
Singh down
in Chandigadh, Punjab. I am ringing to inform you that I am
officially
declaring war on you!"
"Well, Santa Singh," Bush replies, "This indeed is important
news! Tell me,
how big is your army?"
"At this moment in time," says Santa Singh after a moments
calculation,
"There is myself, my cousin Banta Singh, my next door neighbor
Gurjinder
and the entire Kabbadi team from the Village. That makes 8!"
Bush sighs and says, "I must tell you Santa Singh that I have 1
million men
in my army waiting to move on my word."
"OK," says Santa Singh. "I'll have to ring you back!"
Sure enough, the next day Santa Singh calls back. "Right Mr.
Bush, the war
is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!"
"What equipment would that be, Santa Singh?" Bush asks.
"Well, we have 2 combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Gill's
tractor from
the farm."
Once more Bush sighs and says, "I must tell you Santa Singh that
I have
50,000 tanks, 2000mine layers, 10,000 armored cars and my army
has
increased to1 and a half million since we last spoke."
"I'll be dogged!" says Santa Singh. "I'll have to ring you back!"
Sure enough, Santa Singh calls again the next day." Right Mr.
Bush, the war
is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've
gotten out
old Govind's crop sprayer with a couple of rifles in the cockpit
and
the Hockey team has joined us as well!"
Once more Bush sighs and says "I must tell you Santa Singh that I
have 4000
bombers and 8000 high maneuverability attack planes and my
military
installations are surrounded by laser guided surface to air
missiles and
since we last spoke, my army has increased to 2 million."
"Oh cripes," says Santa Singh. "I'll have to ring you back."
Santa Singh calls again the next day. "Okay Mr.Bush, I am sorry
to tell you
that we have had to call off the war."
"I'm very happy to hear that," says Bush. "Why the sudden change
of heart?"
"Well," says Santa Singh, "We've all had a chat and to be sure,
there's no
way we can cope with 2 million prisoners of war."