As I sit here full of rage and anger,
I wonder why life is so full of danger,
can the good Lord tell me why,
is he watching as i sit and cry?
Oh Heavenly Father you say you carry me,
yet at times I feel souly alone,
care less about life so I just let it be,
this cruel world is turning my heart to stone.
I keep my feelings inside though they are hard to hide,
sometimes at night, I just cry and ride,
they say what doesn't kill us makes us stronger,
I don't think I can take this world much longer.
My mind is stricken with memories of pain,
though its still loving to those who are warm,
things look up one minute, then it starts to rain,
life is attacking me like bees in a swarm.
How can any man stand for life's abuse,
at times I feel as if my neck's in a noose,
sins of the past and a life full of griefe,
it seems so long this life, yet i know its too brief.
I've lost so much yet gained so little,
is it possible to ever break this curse,
like those in Purgatory I'm trapped in the middle,
I just want to know happiness before lying in a hurst.
Cringe and currtle but it does no good,
seems only I have problems in my neighborhood,
they say in every storm there is a silver light,
now I hang my head, and my eyes no longer bright.
I often sit with my thoughts and wonder,
feeling as though dealt a helpless hand,
does anyone care is something i must ponder,
one of these days for my toughts, I must take a stand.
In my anger I've apparently lost my happiness,
hating love songs full of devotion and lyrical sappiness,
though my poetry my most prominent expression,
it no longer helps to fight this endless depression.
How long can i take this life full of mistakes,
m ymind is strong though my heart has grown weak,
find something to love, but this brings relentless heart
aches,
all these things pull me down, and make my world bleak.
Life to some is great but to me full of sorrow,
often I wonder if I even care about seeing tomorrow,
without prosperity I feel eternal damnation,
only one dream allows my heart to feel anticipation.
Struggle I must and fight I will,
life's trying to claim me for it's own sick pleasure,
do what you must to relax, or the stress will kill,
now I'm thinking of companionship, being life's only
treasure.
All of this chaos, turmoil, and social destruction,
one day I might explode, like a volcanic erruption,
still I go on and do what I must,
this becomes hard, when theres no one to trust.
As time rolls by and things get worse,
I care less about what others think of me,
everyday my hate grows stronger toward this wretchid curse,
if others truly knew me, maybe my pain could they see.
Though hands of steel, to some remain nourishing,
so many people caught up in sad, empty worshiping,
knowing all of this only helps to enforce what at night I
dream,
it only helps to lower a boy's self-esteam.
Live well as I can not knowing whats going on in my life,
life is a struggle without any discriminations,
stumbling and pleaing, i drive forth in great strife,
pain and sorrow its seems, controls the world's nations.
Do we as humans no longer care,
it seems so hard at times, how much can i bare,
how can we judge one another as if we were the Savior,
why can't we be helpful, granting fellow man a favor?
Maybe all these things are mearly mental illusions,
life is hard and each day seems more unforgiving,
I hallocinate often if my life is free of intrusions,
sometimes I must ask myself ow can I go on lifelessly
living.
Can those around me truly help my heart,
or would my pain and sorrow rip them apart,
through mental stress and emotional pain,
do what I can, trying to avoid the cold rain.
How is it that the poorest man can be the richest,
the richest man yet knows not what to think,
can money and greed eliminate all other interest,
rich men often sad, living thier lives on the brink.
Survival is neccessary for life to continue,
some believe blindly, not a care or a virtue,
it feels this wicked world has twisted my emotion,
is it possible for my heart to knwo total devotion?
Happiness to me seems a distant stranger,
I feel that life may soon end for all of man kind,
life is full of violence and ever present danger,
when the Lord comes, will i be left behind?
During these times who is truly your friend,
we'll never know until our life meets it's end,
how can i know blessed in Heaven or cursed in Hell,
I may never know, for only time can tell.
Though full of pain and agonistic destruction,
we can only try and hold on for ourselves,
would life be boring without painfull interruption,
so many people live cold, and their hearts upon shelves.