The Shaykh – rahimahullaah –
said, [2]
Know O pious brother – may Allaah
make our affairs good – that the manners of companionship and
good relationships are of various types, of which I will
explain, such as will show the person of intellect the manners
of the Believers and the Pious; and come to know that Allaah
the Most Perfect, the Most High has made them a mercy and
helpers towards each other, which is why the Messenger of
Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, ‘‘The
example of the Believers, in their mutual love and mercy is
like the example of a body, if one part feels pain, then all of
the body suffers in sleeplessness and fever.’’ [3] And he (’alayhis-salaam)
said, ‘‘The Believer to the Believer is like a solid building,
one part supporting the other.’’ [4] The Prophet (’alayhis-salaam)
also said, ‘‘The souls are arrayed armies, so those who knew
each one another before, will be friendly…’’ [5] So if Allaah
intends good for His servants, He grants them companionship of
the people of the Sunnah, righteousness and adherence to
the Religion.; and keeps him free from the companionship of the
people of innovations. The Prophet (’alayhis-salaam)
said, ‘‘A person is upon the religion of his friend, so let
every one of you look to whom he keeps as a friend.’’ [6]
‘About a person,
do not ask, but ask about his companion;
Since every
companion follows his friends.’
From the manners of
companionship:
GOOD MANNERS:
Good manners with the brothers,
peers and companions, following the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu
’alayhi wa sallam) as he said, when it was said to him,
‘What is the best of what a person is given?’ So he replied,
‘‘Good manners.’’ [7]
MAKING ONE’S OPINION GOOD:
From the manners of
companionship is behaving well regarding the faults that he
sees of his companions, since Ibn Maazin said, ‘The Believer
seeks excuses for his brothers, whilst the hypocrite seeks out
their faults.’ And Hamdoon al-Qassaar said, ‘If
one of your brothers commits an error, then seek ninety excuses
for him, and if not, then you are the blameworthy one.’
COMPANIONSHIP WITH THE
BELIEVERS:
To keep companionship with one
whose Religion you trust and who is trustworthy, both inwardly
and outwardly. Allaah the – Most High – says,
‘‘You will not find anyone
who believes in Allaah and the Last Day, making friendship with
those who oppose Allaah and His Messenger, even though they
were their fathers, sons, brothers or their relatives. For
such He has written eemaan (faith) in their hearts, and
strengthened them with a spirit (proofs, light and
guidance) from Himself. And We will admit them into gardens
underneath which rivers flow, to dwell therein forever.
Allaah is pleased with them, and they are pleased with
Him. They are the Party of Allaah, indeed it is the Party of
Allaah that will be successful.’’ [Sooratul-Mujaadilah
58:22]
FORMS OF COMPANIONSHIP:
For the Shaykhs and elders: with
respect to service and to carry out their needs.
For those of the same peer group and those of the ‘middle
rank’: with sincere advice, giving what you have and being
prepared to carry out their wishes. For the students and
younger ones: by guidance, teaching of manners, carrying out
what knowledge demands, guidance to the manners of the
Sunnah, rulings concerning the matters of the heart, and to
guide them to develop good manners.
OVERLOOKING MISTAKES:
From the manners of
companionship is overlooking mistakes of the brothers and not
reprimanding them. So al-Fudayl Ibn ’Iyaad
(d.187H) said, ‘Chivalry is to overlook the mistakes of the
brothers.’ Ibnul-A’raabee (d.231H) said, ‘Forgetting the harms
caused by the brothers, causes you love of them to persist.’
So it is binding upon the Believer, that he avoids
seekers of this world, since they will bring him down to the
level of seeking it, and this will distance him from his
salvation and it will distance him from remaining alert and
being aware of it. Rather, he must strive hard in attaining
the companionship of the good and the seekers of the Hereafter.
Therefore, Dhun-Noon (d.245H) said to the one whom he
advised, ‘Accompany the one whom you will be safe from
outwardly, and whom – when you see him – it helps you in doing
good and reminds you of your Lord.’
AGREEMENT WITH THE BROTHERS:
And from them is: not to differ
much with the brothers, but continue agreeing with the brothers
in those things allowed by knowledge and the Sharee’ah.
Aboo ’Uthmaan said, ‘Agreeing with the brothers is better than
showing compassion for them.’
LEAVING OF ENVY:
That he does not envy the signs
of Allaah’s bounty upon them. Rather, he should
be happy for that and praise Allaah for it, just as he would
praise Allaah if it were seen upon him. Allaah – the Most High
– censures the envious one,
‘‘Or do they envy men for
what Allaah has given them from His bounty.’’ [Sooratun-Nisaa‘
4:94]
The Prophet (sallallaahu
’alayhi wa sallam) said, ‘‘Do not envy one another.’’ [8]
TO KEEP A FEELING OF MODESTY:
That he has hayaa‘
(modesty and shame) at all times, as he – ’alayhis-salaam
– said, ‘‘Faith (eemaan) has sixty or seventy odd
branches, the most excellent of them is witnessing that none
has the right to be worshipped besides Allaah, and the lowest
branch is removing something harmful from the road, and
hayaa‘ is from eemaan.’’ [9] He – ’alayhis-salaam
– also said, ‘‘Hayaa‘ is from eemaan, and
eemaan is from Paradise. Speaking obscenely is from
coarseness and coarseness is from the Fire.’’ [10]
COMPANIONSHIP OF THE
DIGNIFIED:
To accompany the one who he has
a feeling of respect for, so that this prevents from acting
contrary to the Sharee’ah. ’Alee (radiyallaahu ’anhu)
said, ‘‘Enliven your feeling of hayaa‘ (shame), by
sitting before those whom you feel shame. Ahmad Ibn Hanbal
(d.241H) – rahimahullaah – said, ‘‘I have not been led
into calamity except by accompanying those before whom I do not
feel shame.’’
SHOWING HAPPINESS:
To have cheerfulness of the
face, kindness of the tongue, largeness of the heart,
outspreading the hands, withholding anger, leaving off pride,
keeping people’s honour in mind and showing happiness at their
companionship and brotherhood.
COMPANIONSHIP OF THE WISE
SCHOLAR:
From good companionship is that
he does not accompany except a Scholar, of a person who is
mild, intelligent and has knowledge. Dhun-Noon –
rahimahullaah – said, ‘Allaah has not disrobed any one
of His servants or a robe better than intellect, and has not
adorned him with a necklace better than knowledge, nor adorned
him with anything better than mildness. And the completeness
of that is taqwaa (fear of Allaah).’
GIVING SINCERE ADVICE:
Having a clean heart with
regards to the brothers and advising them, as Allaah – the Most
High – said,
‘‘Except he who comes to
Allaah with a clean heart.’’ [Sooratush-Shu’araa 26:89]
Saree as-Saqatee (d.257H) –
rahimahullaah – said, ‘One of the best manners of
righteousness is having a good heart as regards the brothers
and to give them sincere advice.’
NOT BREAKING PROMISES:
Since this is from
hypocrisy, and he – ’alayhis-salaatu was-salaam – said,
‘‘The signs of the hypocrite are three: When he speaks he lies,
when he makes a promise he breaks it and when he is entrusted
he acts deceptively.’’ [11] Sufyaan ath-Thawree (d.164H) –
rahimahullaah – said, ‘‘Do not make a promise to your
brother and then break it, so that love turns to hate.’
Footnotes:
[1] He is the muftee and
faqeeh, Abul-Barakaat Badrud-Deen al-Ghazzee. For his
biography, refer to Shadharaatudh-Dhahab (8/403-406) of
Ibnul-’Imaad and al-A’laam (7/59) of az-Ziriklee.
[2] From Aadaabul-’Ishrah wa
Dhikrus-Suhbah wal-Ukhuwwah (p. 9-20) with the checking and
authentication of hadeeth based upon that of Shaykh
’Alee Hasan al-Halabee and also Shaykh Mashhoor Hasan Salmaan.
[3] Related by al-Bukhaaree (no.
6011) and Muslim (no. 2586), from an-Nu’maan Ibn Basheer (radiyallaahu
’anhu).
[4] Related by al-Bukhaaree (no.
481) and Muslim (no. 2585), from Aboo Moosaa al-Ash’aree (radiyallaahu
’anhu).
[5] Saheeh: Related by
al-Bukhaaree (6/369) with ta’leeq (suspension), from
’Aa‘ishah (radiyallaahu ’anhaa). It was connected by
Aboo Ya’laa in al-Musnad (no. 4381) with an isnaad
whose narrators are from as-Saheeh – as occurs in al-Majma’
(8/88) of al-Haythamee.
[6] Hasan: Related by
Ahmad (2/303), Aboo Daawood (no. 4812) and at-Tirmidhee (no.
2484), from Aboo Hurayrah (radiyallaahu ’anhu). It was
authenticated by Imaam an-Nawawee in Riyaadus-Saaliheen
(no. 174).
[7] Saheeh: Related by
Wakee’ in az-Zuhd (no. 423), Ibn Hibbaan (1/427) and at-Tabaraanee
in al-Kabeer (1/147), from Usaamah Ibn Shareek (radiyallaahu
’anhu). It was authenticated by al-Haafidh al-’Iraaqee in
Takhreejul-Ihyaa‘ (2/157).
[8] Related by al-Bukhaaree
(10/484) and Muslim (no. 2564), from Aboo Hurayrah (radiyallaahu
’anhu).
[9] Related by al-Bukhaaree
(1/44) and Muslim (1/46)
[10] Saheeh: Related by
Ahmad (2/501) and at-Tirmidhee (no. 2077) with a saheeh
isnaad, from Aboo Hurayrah (radiyallaahu ’anhu).
[11] Related by al-Bukhaaree
(5/289) and Muslim (1/76)