|
 In
the Name of Allah, Most
Gracious, Most Merciful
Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem
I I
I I I
Alhamduli'
Allah Rabbil-'Alamin wa-Salaatu wa-Salaamu 'alaa
Ashrafil-Anbiyaa-e-wal-Mursaleen, wa ba'd.
Asalaamu
Alaikum wa Rahmatullaahi wa Baakaatuhu
Dear
Brothers & Sisters
I pray
that you are all well and in strength of eemaan.
Some
mornings when we wake up, some of us may start the day feeling
stressed, worried and an overwhelming sense of aloneness
overtaking us. As if our mind is covered by layers and layers of
dark clouds, with the sense of living but making no difference to
the world and that the world could do very well without us,
seeing no hope, only despair.
Everyone
knows how to thrive in the good times. It is the trying times
that separate the one who has substance from the one who merely
possesses the image. Through trials and tribulations, we may
think that one endures by enduring, thus, the human spirit
truimphs over itself. Are we correct in thinking this way?
Imagine
if we were given a miracle formula or a pill that would enable us
instantly to eliminate all the negative experiences in our life.
How wonderful would our life be? We would have no worries and
would live stress free. Right? Wouldn't this be the ultimate
dream come true?
But the
fact is that if such a formula or pill existed, it would not make
us happy or even stress-free. Is the emphasis on eliminating
negative experiences when trying to alleviate stress the answer?
No, the absence of negative experiences in our life does not
alone contribute to the quality of our life. As humans we need
patience and endurance to meet the challenges in order to develop
fully and bring forth all the positive aspects within ourselves.
By carefully observing life, we realise that the true nature of
crisis is an opportunity in disguise. Without the strength of
eemaan and patience to endure the crisis, we will not see the
relief and opportunity within. It is within the process of faith
in endurance that relief and opportunity reveals itself.
Opportunity always exists within a crisis situation, but when we
lose heart and faith in a devastating crisis, we are blinded by
our own emotion. Only when we can calmly have patience to endure
the unendurable, the opportunity for a better alternative
surfaces and reveals itself.
Allah
Subhanahu wa Ta'ala has foreordained the fate of all of us,
written down our impacts and deeds, portioned out between us our
livelihood and wealth and created death and life that He Ta'ala
may test us which is best in deed. Indeed, belief in Allah
Subhanahu wa Ta'ala's decree and preordainment is one of the
pillars of faith. Nothing happens in this universe except by His
Ta'ala's Will.
In Surah
Al Balad 90:4 Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says (the translation of
the meaning): "Verily We have created Man into toil and
struggle" meaning that man is born to strive and struggle;
and if he suffers hardships, he must exercise patience, for Allah
Subhanahu wa Ta'ala will make his way smooth for him. We must
trust in Allah Ta'ala, and do whatever is possible for us in our
life's passage and must not be frightened by difficulties. Allah
Ta'ala will give us relief and provide a solution if we act with
honest and sincere integrity. (Commentary:
Abdullah Yusuf Ali - may Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala bless his
soul).
Allah
Subhanahu wa Ta'ala also repeats in ayat 5 and 6 of Surah Al
Sharh a.k.a. Al Inshirah 94:5-6 (the translation of the meaning)
- "So, verily, with every difficulty, there is relief.
Verily, with every difficulty there is relief." These ayat
(verses) are repeated twice for extra emphasis so that we know
that whatever difficulties or troubles are encountered by men,
Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala always provides a solution, a way out,
a relief, a way to lead to ease and happiness, if we only follow
His Path and show our Faith by patience and well-doing. The
solution or relief does not merely come after the
Difficulty: it is provided with it. The definite article
in al 'usr in a generic sense, and translate: "every difficulty".
(Commentary: Abdullah Yusuf Ali - may Allah
Subhanahu wa Ta'ala bless his soul).
Please
find attached the articles written by Shaykh Muhammad Sâlih al-Munajjid
entitled "Dealing with Worry and Stress" which discusses the
different kinds of remedies and treatments taught by Islam:
Prologue
/ Introduction on "Dealing with Worry and Stress
Part 1: Kind of Stress and Worry
Part 2: Islam's Treatment for
Anxiety and Worry
Part 3:
Writings of Imam Ibn al-Qayyim on Treating Distress and Grief
Part 4: Du'a
Part 5: Reminder
So dear
brothers and sisters, do remember that no condition is permanent.
Fortunate is he who is always God-conscious. Fear Allah Subhanahu
wa Ta'ala in any condition you may find yourself. You can do
nothing to prevent what has been destined to happen as you do
nothing to attain what has not been pre-ordained. The ability to
choose and control is with Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala Alone and
His choice for His slave is better for him than his choice for
himself. Dawood bin Sulaymaan said, "Three things indicate the
piety of a believer; his trust in Allah in what he has not
attained; his satisfaction with whatever he has attained and his
patience over what he has missed." (Sheikh Abdul
Muhsin Al-Qaasim - Al-Jum'ah 5 Muharram, 1422 , 20 March, 2001)
Fi Amman
Allah
AbDuLmAtEeNkHaN
Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem
________________________
Dealing with Worry and Stress
by Shaykh Muhammad Sâlih al-Munajjid
Introduction
Praise be to Allâh, the
Lord of the Worlds, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate,
the Master of the Day of Judgement. I bear witness that there
is no god but He, the Lord of the earlier and later generations
and Sustainer of heaven and earth. Peace and blessings be upon
the one who was sent as a Mercy to the worlds. I bear witness
that he is the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh
be upon him). Peace and blessings be upon him, upon all his
Family and Companions, and upon those who believe in his
guidance and follow in his footsteps until the Day of Judgement.
It is the nature of this life that people will suffer from
worries and stress, because this world is the place of disease,
hardship and suffering. Hence among the things that distinguish
Paradise from this world is the fact that there is no worry or
stress there:
| |
“No sense of fatigue shall touch
them nor shall they be asked to leave [Al-Hijr 15:48 –
interpretation of the meaning. |
|
Nothing ever upsets the
people of Paradise, not even the slightest word:
| |
“No laghw (dirty, false, evil
vain talk) will they hear therein, nor any sinful speech
(like backbiting, etc.), but only the saying of Salâm!
Salâm! (greetings with peace).” [al-Wâqi’ah 56:25-26 –
interpretation of the meaning].
|
|
It is also the nature of
this life that people have to put up with suffering and hardship
for various reasons, as is indicated in the Qur’ân
(interpretation of the meaning):
| |
“Verily, We have created man in
toil.” [al-Balad 90:4]. |
|
So people feel regret for
what has happened in the past, anxious about what may happen in
the future, and worried about what is going on in the present.
The things that cross our minds and make us feel distressed are
things in the past that have caused grief, things in the future
that we are worried about, and things in the present which
concern us.
People react differently to stress and worries, depending on how
many things are concerning them, whether the worry is continuous
or not, and on whether they have faith in their hearts or are
rebellious and sinful.
We may describe people’s hearts as being of two types: either the
heart is the throne of Allâh, filled with light, life, happiness,
joy and all the treasures of goodness; or it is the throne of
Shaytân, wherein is distress, darkness, death, grief, worry and
anxiety.
People’s worries and concerns will also differ, according to the
differences in their motivations, circumstances and individual
responsibilities.
One type of worry or concern is that which may be described as
worthwhile worries that are a good sign, such as a scholar’s
anxiety to resolve difficult issues concerning which the Muslims
need an answer – especially when the matter is very serious and
there appears to be no solution. Another example is the concern
of the Muslim leader about the problems of the people under his
care. This is what made the two ‘Umars (i.e. ‘Umar ibn al-Khattâb
and ‘Umar ibn ‘Abd al-‘Azîz) and other leaders worried and
anxious. ‘Umar ibn al-Khattâb used to think about how to prepare
the army whilst he was praying, and he was excused for that; he
also used to worry about the animals stumbling in the land of
‘Irâq. ‘Umar ibn ‘Abd al-‘Azîz used to express his suffering
thus:
| |
“I am dealing with something
with which no one could help me except Allâh. The elderly
have reached the ends of their lives with it (in this
situation), the youth have grown up with it; the foreigners
have learnt Arabic and the Bedouin have migrated to the
cities in these circumstances. [It is so well-entrenched]
that they think this is religion, and they can see the
truth nowhere else but in this.”
|
When the khilâfah passed to
him and the people gave their bay’ah (oath of allegiance) to him,
he came home, feeling anxious and stressed. His freed slave said
to him:
| |
“Why do I see you so anxious
and stressed? This is not how you should He said, “Woe to
you! How could I not be anxious when there is no one in the
East nor the West of this ummah who is not demanding his
rights of me or asking me to help settle some matter with
another person, whether he writes down his request or not,
whether he asks me directly or not?”
|
The more any decision had
to do with the fate of the Muslims, the greater the anxiety and
stress involved. Hence when ‘Abd al-Rahmân ibn ‘Awf was entrusted
with the task of selecting the next khalîfah for the Muslims,
after the death of ‘Umar, he did not sleep during that period,
because he was so busy consulting the Muslims, even the old
women.
Other types of commendable concern include: the concern of the
dai’yah who is striving to spread Islâm and convey the message,
guiding others to the path of Guidance; the concern of the
worshipper to ensure that his worship is correct both in
intention and practice; and the concern of the Muslim for the
suffering of his brothers in faith throughout the world.
The kinds of anxieties that may result from committing sin
include: the distress suffered after shedding blood wrongfully;
or the anxiety of a woman who is pregnant as a result of
fornication or adultery.
The kinds of distress that result from wrongful treatment at the
hands of others include that suffered because of mistreatment by
one's own relatives, as the poet said:
| |
“The wrong suffered at the hands
of those who are closely-related is more painful to bear than
a blow from a powerful sword.” |
Distress suffered because
of the calamities that happen in this world include: chronic or
serious diseases, disobedience of children towards their parents,
hostility on the part of one’s wife or mistreatment on the part
of one’s husband.
Some kinds of anxiety result from fears about what may lie ahead
in the future, for example a father may be worried about what
will happen to his children after he dies, especially if they are
weak and he has nothing to leave behind for them.
These are a few examples of different kinds of stress and worry.
We will discuss the matter in further detail below:
Part 1 : Kinds of Stress
and Worry
Part 2 : Islâm's Treatment
for Anxiety and Worry
Part 3 : Writings of Imam
Ibn al-Qayyim on Treating Distress and Grief
Part 4 : Du'â'
(supplication)
Part 5 : Reminder
http://www.islaam.net/display/display.php?id=701&category=3
Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem
_______________________
Dealing with Worry and
Stress
Part 1
Kind of Stress and Worry
by Shaykh Muhammad Sâlih al-Munajjid
_______________________________________________________________________________
Kinds of Stress and Worry
The distress suffered by
the dai’yah when he calls his people to Islâm. The Prophets had
more than their fair share of this kind of stress. Aishah (may
Allâh be pleased with her) told her nephew (the son of her
sister) ‘Urwah that she asked the Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allâh be upon him):
| |
“Did you ever suffer any
day worse than the day of Uhud?” He said:
“I suffered what I suffered
at the hands of your people, and the worst that I
suffered from them was on the day of ‘Aqabah, when I
had made an appeal to Ibn ‘Abd Yâlayl ibn ‘Abd Kalâl
and he did not respond in the way I had hoped for. I
left him, hardly knowing where I was going, and I did
not realize where I was until I had reached Qarn al-Tha’âlib.
I raised my head, and saw a cloud which was shading me.
I looked in it, and saw Jibrâ’îl, who called to me and
said: ‘Allâh has heard what your people have said to
you, and their response to you. He has sent to you the
Angel of the Mountains, to do whatever you tell him to
do to them.’ Then the Angel of the Mountains called to
me, greeted me, and said, ‘O Muhammad, if you wish, I
will crush them between two mountains.’”The
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
said, “Rather, I hope that
Allâh will bring forth from their descendents people
who will worship Allâh alone and not associate anything
with Him.”
|
The Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him) suffered similar distress when
his people disbelieved his account of his Night Journey (Isrâ’).
Muslim (may Allâh have mercy on him) narrated from Abu Hurayrah
that the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him) said:
| |
“I found myself in the
Hijr (an area in the Haram in Makkah, near the Ka’bah),
and Quryash were asking me about my Night Journey,
questions about Bayt al-Maqdis that I was not sure of.
I felt more distressed and anxious than I had ever
felt, then Allâh raised it for me so that I could see
what they were asking me about and answer all their
questions…”
|
Concern about acts of
worship. The Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh
be upon him) was very concerned about telling people about
salât (prayer). Abu ‘Umayr ibn Anas reported from his
(paternal) uncles among the Ansâr that the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him) was worried about how to gather
the people together for prayers. Someone suggested that he set
up a flag, so that people would see it and tell one another,
but he did not like this idea. Another suggestion was a ram’s
horn (the shofar of the Jews), but he did not like this idea,
and said, “This belongs to the Jews.”
Someone else suggested a bell, but he said,
“This belongs to the Christians.”
‘Abd-Allâh ibn Zayd ibn ‘Abd Rabbihi went away, worrying about
the concern of the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him), and he was shown the adhân (call to prayer)
in a dream. The next morning he came to the Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) and told him about
it:
| |
O Messenger of Allâh, whilst I
was half asleep and half awake, someone came to me and
showed me the adhân…” |
The anxiety faced by the
truthful person when he is disbelieved. This happened to the
great Sahâbi Zayd ibn al-Arqam (may Allâh be pleased with him),
when he heard the chief of the munâfiqîn (hypocrites) saying to
his colleagues:
| |
“When we return to Madînah,
the one who has pride and power will expel the one who is
humiliated” |
(meaning that the “one
who has pride and power” was himself, and the “one who is
humilated” was the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him) and the people with him). Zayd said:
| |
“I told my (paternal) uncle,
and he went and informed the Messenger of Allâh (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him). The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) sent for (the
chief of the munâfiqîn, ‘Abd-Allâh ibn Ubayy), who swore
that he had said no such thing. The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) believed him and
not me. My uncle came to me and scolded me: “All you wanted
was for the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him) and the Muslims to hate you and
disbelieve you!” I felt extreme anxiety and stress, such as
no one has ever suffered. When I was on a journey with the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him), I hung my head with worry. Then the Messenger of
Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) came up to
me, tweaked my ear, and smiled at me. I felt happy in a way
that I would not exchange immortal life in this world for
that feeling. Then Abu Bakr caught up with me and asked me
what the Messenger of Allâh had said to me. I said, ‘He did
not say anything, but he tweaked my ear and smiled at me.’
He told me, ‘Be of good cheer!’ Then ‘Umar caught up with
me and I told him what I had told Abu Bakr. The next
morning, the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him) recited Sűrat al-Munâfiqűn to us.’”
|
According to a report
narrated by Muslim, which tells the same story, Zayd said:
| |
“I came to the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him) and told him about it.
He sent for ‘Abd-Allâh ibn Ubayy and asked him about it,
but he insisted and swore that he had done no such thing,
saying, ‘Zayd is telling lies to the Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him).’ I felt very
hurt because of what they said, until Allâh revealed words
confirming that I had spoken the truth |
(interpretation of the
meaning):
| |
‘When the hypocrites come to
you…’ [al-Munâfiqűn 63:1]” |
|
The anxiety suffered by
an innocent person when false accusations are made. An example
of this is what happened to Aishah (may Allâh be pleased with
her) when the munâfiqűn accused her of sin during the campaign
of Muraysi’. She was ill, and when she heard the news of the
rumours from one of the women of her household, she became even
sicker, and felt very distressed. She said:
| |
“I said, ‘Subhân-Allâh! Are
people talking about that?’ I wept all night, until
morning, and never slept; my tears never stopped falling.
Then I wept all day, and never slept; my tears never
stopped falling. My parents came to me the next morning,
after I had cried for two nights and a day, without ceasing
and without sleeping. They thought that this weeping would
kill me. Whilst they were sitting with me, and I was
crying, a woman of the Ansâr asked permission to see me. I
gave her permission, and she sat down, weeping with me.
Whilst we were sitting thus, the Messenger of Allâh (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him) came in, greeted us,
and sat down. He had not come to visit me since the rumours
had started, and for a month there had been no Revelation
concerning my situation. Whilst he was sitting there, the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him) recited the Shahâdah, then he said:
‘O Aishah, I have heard
such-and-such about you. If you are innocent, Allâh will
prove your innocence, and if you did commit a sin, then ask
for Allâh’s forgiveness and repent to Him, for when the
slave admits his sin and repents to Allâh, Allâh will
accept his repentance.’When the Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) had finished
what he had to say, my tears stopped completely, and I said
to my father: ‘Respond to what the Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) has said.’ He
said, ‘By Allâh, I do not know what I should say to the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him).’ I said to my mother: ‘Respond to what the Messenger
of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) has
said.’ She said, ‘By Allâh, I do not know what I should say
to the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him).’ I said: ‘I am only a young girl and I do not
know much of the Qur’ân. By Allâh, I have nothing to say to
you except the words of the father of Yűsuf:
So (for me) patience is most
fitting. And it is Allâh (Alone) Whose help can be sought
against that which you assert.” [Yűsuf 12:18]. ’Then
I turned away and lay down on my bed. Then Allâh revealed
(interpretation of the meaning): |
| |
‘Verily! Those who brought
forth the slander (against Aishah) are a group among you.
Consider it not a bad thing for you…’”
[al-Nűr 24:11 – see complete
passage, âyat 11 to 20].
|
|
Before Aishah’s time,
Maryam bint ‘Imrân had suffered a great deal of stress and
anxiety because she became pregnant without being married. Her
distress reached such an extent that:
| |
“…She said: ‘Would that I had
died before this, and had been forgotten and out of
sight!’” [Maryam 19:23 – interpretation of the meaning].
|
|
She spoke thus because
she knew that people would accuse her and not believe her when
she came to them with a child in her arms, because she had been
one of the devoted female worshippers who lived in seclusion
close to the mosque, and she came from a very religious
household and was descended from Prophets. Because of all this,
she bore such a great burden of anxiety that she wished that
she had died before this happened to her, or that she “
had been forgotten and out of sight,”in other words,
that she had never been created at all.
Another example is the story of the women who was accused
unjustly. Aishah (may Allâh be pleased with her) told her
story:
| |
“A black woman who belonged
to some of the Arabs became Muslim. She had a cubicle in
the mosque. She used to come to us and talk with us, and
when she had finished conversing with us, she told us:
The day of the wishâh (an ornamented girdle worn by
women) was one of the wonders of our Lord. Indeed, it is
He Who saved me from the land of kufr disbelief).’” When
she repeated this several times, Aishah asked her, “What
was the day of the girdle?” She said: “A young girl who
belonged to some of my people went out wearing a girdle
made of leather. She dropped it, and a kite (a kind of
hawk) came and swooped it up, thinking that it was a
piece of meat. They accused me of taking it, and they
began to punish me, to the extent that they even searched
my private parts. Whilst they were surrounding me and I
was in that state of distress, the kite flew back over
our heads and dropped the belt. They picked it up, and I
said to them: ‘This is what you accused me of, and I was
innocent!’”
|
A man’s worry about what
may happen to his wife and children after his death. Aishah
(may Allâh be pleased with her) reported that the Messenger of
Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) used to say:
| |
“One of the things that
concerns me is what will happen to you [his wives] after my
death, for none will be able to take care of you properly
except those who are truly patient.” |
Anxiety because of a
loan. An example of this is what happened to al-Zubayr (may
Allâh be pleased with him), whose story was told by his son
‘Abd-Allâh ibn al-Zubayr:
| |
“When al-Zubayr stood up to
fight at the Battle of the Camel, he called me, so I went
and stood by his side. He said: ‘O my son, no-one will be
killed today except one who is a wrongdoer or one to whom
wrong is done. I can see that I will die today as one to
whom wrong is done. My greatest concern is my debts – do
you think that any of our wealth will be left after
paying off our debts? O my son, sell our property and pay
off our debts.’” ‘Abd-Allâh said: “He started to advise
me what to do about his debt, and told me: ‘O my son, if
you are unable to pay off anything, seek the help of my
mawlâ.’ By Allâh, I did not know what he meant until I
asked, ‘O my father, who is your mawlâ?’ He said: ‘Allâh.’
By Allâh, every time I felt distress because of
difficulty in paying off his debt, I prayed, ‘O Mawlâ of
al-Zubayr, pay off his debt,’ and Allâh paid it off…’”
‘Abd-Allâh ibn al-Zubayr said: “I calculated how much he
owed, and found it to be two million and two hundred
thousand… (some of al-Zubayr’s friends did not think it
possible to pay off such a great debt, but Allâh greatly
blessed some land belonging to al-Zubayr, and
surprisingly enough, when it was divided up and sold off,
there was enough to pay off the debt and have something
left over)…Al-Zubayr had four wives: one-third of his
wealth was put aside for them, and each wife got one
million and two hundred thousand. The total sum of his
wealth was fifty million and two hundred thousand.”
|
Anxiety caused by dreams.
This happened to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him), as he said:
| |
“Whilst I was sleeping, the
treasures of the earth were brought to me, and two
armlets of gold were placed on my arms. That distressed
me, but Allâh revealed to me that I should blow them
away, so I did so, and they disappeared. I interpreted
them as being the two liars whom I am facing, the one in
Sana’â’ and the one in al-Yamâmah.”
|
Ibn ‘Umar (may Allâh be
pleased with him and his father) also felt distress because of
a dream which he saw. He told us about it:
| |
“Some men among the
Companions of the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings
of Allâh be upon him) used to see dreams at the time of
the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him). They used to tell him about them, and he would
say ‘Ma sha’ Allâh.’ I was a young boy, and I used to
live in the mosque before I got married. I said to
myself, ‘If you were any good, you would have seen
something like these people have seen.’ When I lay down
that night, I said, ‘O Allâh, if You see any good in me,
then let me see a dream.’ Then two angels came to me,
each of whom was holding an iron bridle in his hand. They
dragged me to Hell, and I was praying, ‘O Allâh, I seek
refuge with you from Hell.’ Then I dreamt that I was met
by another angel, who was also holding an iron bridle in
his hand. He said, ‘Do not worry, you are a good man, if
only you prayed more.’ They took me to the edge of Hell,
and it was shaped like a well with horns; between every
two horns was an angel holding an iron bridle. I saw in
it men suspended upside down from chains, and I
recognized some men of Quraysh. Then they led me off
towards the right. I told Hafsah about it, and Hafsah
told the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh
be upon him). (According to a report narrated by Muslim:
“When I woke up, I felt worried and scared about what I
had seen, so I asked Hafsah about it, and she said, ‘It
is good, what you have seen.’ I said to her, ‘Ask the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him) about it,’ so she asked him.”) The Messenger of
Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said: ‘‘Abd-Allâh
is a righteous man, if only he prayed at night.’”
Nâfi’ said: “After that, he always prayed a great deal.”
|
Islâm prescribes a number
of ways to deal with the distress that results from seeing
nightmares and frightening dreams.
Having described a number of kinds of distress and anxiety
experienced in this world, we will now discuss ways of dealing
with them.
Undoubtedly the first thing we should mention when discussing
worries and anxiety is: ‘aqîdah (belief) and îman (faith), and
the effects they have on dealing with stress. One can see many
of the kuffâr and Muslims who are weak in faith suffering
breakdowns and committing suicide in an effort to rid
themselves of depression, frustration and despair when they get
into trouble or when disaster strikes. Hospitals are full of
patients who are suicidal or have suffered nervous breakdowns,
or other kinds of psychological trauma. These problems affect
many of those who are strong, let alone those who are weak. How
often they lead to complete incapacity and loss of sanity!
The person who has been guided to Islâm, if his ‘aqîdah is
sound and his îmân is strong, will find the cure in that which
has come from Allâh, the All-Knowing and All-Aware, Who created
all things and Who knows best what befits His creation.
"Should not He Who
created know?And He is the Most Kind and Courteous (to His
slaves) All-Aware (of everything)." (al-Mulk 67:14 -
interpretation of the meaning).
http://www.islaam.net/display/display.php?part=1&category=3&id=701 DDN
Bismillaahir Rahmaanir Raheem
_______________________
Dealing with Worry and
Stress
Part 2
Islam's Treatment for
Anxiety and Worry
by Shaykh Muhammad Sâlih al-Munajjid
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Islâm's Treatment for Anxiety and Worry
Let
us now discuss some of the different kinds of remedies and
treatments taught by Islâm:
1. Equipping oneself with îmân (faith), accompanied by
righteous deeds.
Allâh says (interpretation of the meaning):
| |
“Whoever works
righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or
she) is a true believer, verily, to him We will give a
good life (in this world, with respect, contentment and
lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a
reward in proportion to the best of what they used to
do (i.e., Paradise in the Hereafter).” [al-Nahl 16:97]
|
|
The
reason for this is clear: the believers in Allâh whose faith
is correct and motivates them to do righteous deeds that
reform their hearts and characters, and change their status
in this world and the next, have the basic principles
according to which they deal with every kind of joy and grief
that they may face. They receive blessings and joys with
acceptance and thanksgiving, and put them to use in
beneficial ways. When they do this, they feel happy and hope
that it will last and will bring them reward for their
gratitude, as well as other things that will supercede the
original goodness and blessings.
When faced with distress, harm, worries and anxieties, they
try to resist them and reduce them as much as they can, and
they react with befitting patience to the things in which
they have no choice. They gain a lot of benefits as a result,
such as: resilience and toughness as is appropriate; useful
experience, strong willpower, patience, the hope of reward,
and many other benefits which reduce the distress felt. Thus
their anxiety is replaced with joy and the hope of blessings
and reward from Allâh, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him) stated in the sahîh hadîth: “How
marvellous is the affair of the believer! Everything that
happens to him is good, and this does not apply to anyone
except the believer. If something good befalls him, he gives
thanks for it, and that is good for him. If something bad
befalls him, he bears it with patience, and that is good for
him.”
This is the way in which we may view calamities in a positive
light. Another example is:
2. Thinking of how the Muslim may earn expiation for his
sins, purify his heart and raise his status, when he is
stricken with distress and worry in this life.
The Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him) said:
| |
“Nothing of fatigue,
illness, distress, worry, grief or harm befalls the
Muslim, not even a prick from a thorn, but Allâh will
accept it as expiation for some of his sins.”
|
According to a report narrated by Muslim:
| |
“No illness, fatigue,
sickness or grief befalls the Muslim, not even worries,
but it will be an expiation for some of his sins.”
|
The
one who is distressed or worried should know that whatever
psychological pain afflicts him is not wasted, but serves a
purpose in increasing his hasanât (good deeds) and expiating
for his sayi’ât (bad deeds). The Muslim should realize that
if it were not for disasters and afflictions, we would come
empty-handed on the Day of Resurrection, as some of the salaf
(early generations of Islâm) pointed out, which is why they
would rejoice when misfortune struck just as we rejoice at
times of ease.
When a person understands how the disasters that befall him
expiate for his sins, he will rejoice and be of good cheer,
especially if that happens to him straight after he has
committed a sin, as happened to some of the Sahâbah, may
Allâh be pleased with them. ‘Abd-Allâh ibn Mughaffal (may
Allâh be pleased with him) reported that a man met a woman
who had been a prostitute during the time of Jâhiliyyah. He
started to joke with her, then he touched her. She told him,
“Watch it! Allâh has destroyed
shirk (once ‘Affân said: has destroyed Jâhiliyyah) and has
brought us Islâm.” The man went away, and walked into
a wall, cutting his face. The Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him) came along, so the man told him what had
happened, and he said: “You are a
slave for whom Allah wishes good. When Allâh wishes good for
His slave, He hastens the punishment for his sin; when He
does not wish good for His slave, he withholds the punishment
until the matter is settled on the Day of Resurrection, when
all of his sins will be brought forth together.”
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:
| |
“When Allâh wishes good for
His slave, He hastens to bring about his punishment in
this world, and if He does not wish good for him, He
withholds the punishment until he is dealt with for his
sin on the Day of Resurrection.” |
3.
Understanding the reality of this world
The believer knows that this world is only temporary, that
its luxuries are few, and that whatever pleasures exist here
are always imperfect. If it causes a little laughter, it
gives many reasons to weep; if it gives a little, it
withholds far more. The believer is only detained here, as
the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him) said:
| |
“This world is the prison of
the believer and the paradise of the kâfir.” |
This
world is also fatigue, pain, misery and suffering, so the
believer feels relief when he departs from it. Abu Qutâdah
ibn Rib’i al-Ansâri used to say that a funeral passed the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
and he said: “He is now relieved,
and people feel relieved of him.” The people asked,
“O Messenger of Allâh, how can he
be relieved and people feel relieved of him?” He said,
“The believing slave (who dies) is
relieved of the fatigue and pain of this world and has gone
to the mercy of Allâh; when the rebellious slave dies,
people, land, trees and animals are relieved of him.”
For the believer, death brings a respite from the distress,
worries and pain of this life, as is stated in the hadîth:
| |
“When the believer is
about to die, the angels of mercy bring white silk and
say, ‘Come out content, with the pleasure of Allâh upon
you, to the mercy of Allâh and sweet fragrance and a
Lord who is not angry.’ So (the soul) comes out like
the best fragrance of musk and the angels hand it to
one another until they bring it to the gate of heaven.
They say, ‘How good is this fragrance that has come
from the earth.’ They bring it to the souls of the
believers, and they rejoice over it much more than you
do when one who has been absent returns. They ask him,
‘What did So-and-so do? What did So-and-so do?’ then
(the angels) say, ‘Leave him alone, for he was
suffering the distress of the world.’ When he asks,
‘Did not So-and-so come to you?’ they say: ‘He was
taken to his home in the Pit (i.e., Hell).’ When the
kâfir is about to die, angels of punishment bring
sackcloth and say, ‘Come out discontent, with the wrath
of Allâh upon you, to the punishment of Allâh.’ So (the
soul) comes out like the worst stench of rotten meat,
and they take it to the gate of the earth. They say,
‘How foul is this stench,’ until they bring it to the
souls of the kuffâr.”
|
This
understanding of the reality of this world makes it easier
for the believer to bear afflictions, pains, distress and
anxiety, because he knows that they are an inevitable part of
the nature of this life.
4. Following the examples of the Prophets and the righteous
The Prophets and the righteous suffered more distress in this
world than other people. Each person is tested according to
the strength of his faith. If Allâh loves a person, He tests
him. Sa’d (may Allâh be pleased with him) asked the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him):
| |
“O Messenger of Allâh,
which of the people suffers the most distress?” He
said: “The Prophets, then
those who come after them (in terms of status), then
those who come after them. A man will be tested
according to the strength of his faith. If his faith is
strong, then the distress with which he is tried will
be greater; if his faith is weak, he will be tested in
accordance with the level of his faith. Distress will
keep on befalling the slave until he walks on the face
of the earth free from sin.”
|
5.
Making the Hereafter one’s main concern
The concerns of this world overwhelm and confuse people, but
if the slave makes the Hereafter his main concern, Allâh will
help him to focus and be determined, as was narrated by Anas
(may Allâh be pleased with him):
| |
“The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:‘Whoever
has the Hereafter as his main concern, Allâh will fill
his heart with a feeling of richness and independence;
he will be focused and feel content, and this world
will come to him in spite of it. Whoever has this world
as his main concern, Allâh will cause him to feel
constant fear of poverty; he will be distracted and
unfocused, and he will have nothing of this world
except what was already predestined for him.’”
|
Ibn
al-Qayyim (may Allâh have mercy on him) said:
| |
“When a person spends his
entire day with no other concern but Allâh alone, Allâh,
may He be glorified, will take care of all his needs
and take care of all that is worrying him; He will
empty his heart so that it will be filled only with
love for Him, free his tongue so that it will speak
only in remembrance of Him (dhikr) and cause all his
faculties to work only in obedience to Him. But if a
person spends his entire day with no other concern but
this world, Allâh will make him bear its distress,
anxiety and pain; He will leave him to sort himself
out, and cause his heart to be distracted from the love
of Allâh towards the love of some created being, cause
his tongue to speak only in remembrance of that
creation instead of remembering Allâh, and cause his
faculties to work in obeying and serving them. So he
will strive hard, labouring like some work-animal, to
serve something other than Allâh… Everyone who turns
away from being a true slave of Allâh and obeying Him
and loving Him will be burdened with servitude, love
and obedience to some created being. Allâh
says(interpretation of the meaning):
‘And whosoever turns away
(blinds himself) from the remembrance of the Most
Beneficent (Allâh), We appoint for him a shaytân
(devil) to be a qarîn (intimate companion) to him.’
[al-Zukhruf 43:36].”
|
|
6. A
surprisingly effective remedy: remembering death
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:
| |
“Remember frequently the
one who will destroy all your pleasures: death, for
there is no-one who remembers death when in straitened
circumstances, but his situation will become easier,
and there is no-one who remembers death during times of
ease, but his circumstances will become straitened.”
|
7.
Praying to Allâh, may He be exalted
Du’â’ (prayer or supplication) is very beneficial, and
includes both protection and treatment. As far as protection
in concerned, the Muslim is obliged to turn to Allâh and pray
to Him for refuge from distress and to keep him away from it,
as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
used to do. His servant Anas (may Allâh be pleased with him)
tells us: “I used to serve the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
when he stayed in Madînah (i.e. was not travelling). I often
used to hear him saying:‘Allâhumma
inni a’űdhu bika min al-hamm wa’l-hazn wa’l-‘ajz wa’l-kasal
wa’l-bukhl wa’l-jubn wa dala’ al-dayn wa ghalbat al-rijâl (O
Allâh, I seek refuge with You from distress, grief,
incapacity, laziness, miserliness, cowardice, the burden of
debt and from being overpowered by men).’” This
du’â’ is very effective in preventing distress before it
happens; prevention is better, and easier, than cure.
When one is worried about what may happen in the future, the
following du’â’ is very beneficial. Abu Hurayrah (may Allâh
be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him) used to say:
| |
“Allâhumma aslih li dîni
alladhi huwa ‘ismat amri wa aslih li dunyâya allati
fihâ ma’âshi wa aslih li âkhirati allati fihâ ma’âdi
w’aj’al al-hayâta ziyâdatan li fi kulli khayri w’aj’al
al-mawta râhatan li min kulli sharr (O Allâh, make me
adhere properly to my religion, on which all my affairs
depend; make this world good for me in which is my
livelihood; make my Hereafter good for me, in which is
my ultimate destiny; make my life increase in every
good thing and make my death a respite from every
evil).”
|
When
distress and pain befall a person, the door of du’â’ is
always open to him; it is never closed. When one calls upon
the Most Generous, He will respond and give. Allâh says
(interpretation of the meaning):
| |
“And when My slaves ask
you concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near
(to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations
of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any
mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and
believe in Me, so that they may be led aright.” [al-Baqarah
2:186]
|
|
One
of the greatest du’â’s which take away distress and anxiety
and bring joy is the famous du’â’ which the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him) encouraged everyone who
hears it to learn it by heart:
The Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon
him) said:
| |
“There is no-one who is
afflicted by distress and grief, and says: ‘Allâhumma
inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn amatija nâsyati bi yadika,
mâda fiyya hukmuka, ‘adlun fiyya qadâ’uka. As’aluka bi
kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw
anzaltahu fi kitâbika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika
aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilm il-ghayb ‘indaka an taj’al
al-Qur’âna rabî’ qalbi wa nűr sadri wa jalâ’ huzni wa
dhihâb hammi (O Allâh, I am Your slave, son of Your
slave, son of Your maidservant; my forelock is in Your
hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your
decree over me is just. I ask You by every name
belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or
revealed in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your
creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge of the
Unseen with You, that You make the Qur’ân the life of
my heart and the light of my breast, and a departure
for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety),’ but Allâh
will take away his distress and grief, and replace it
with joy.” He was asked: “O Messenger of Allâh, should
we learn this?” He said: “Of course; everyone who hears
it should learn it.”
|
This
important hadîth indicates the following: the slave should
admit that he belongs to Allâh and that he cannot do without
Him and has no other master than Allâh; that he should be a
slave to Allâh, announce his submission to Him, obey His
commandments and heed His prohibitions; that Allâh is
directing and controlling him as He wills; that he should
demonstrate his submission to Allâh and his acceptance of His
decree; that he should pray to Allâh, using all His Names,
then ask for what he needs.
A number of other du’â’s to do with distress and anxiety have
also been narrated in the Sunnah. They include the following:
Ibn ‘Abbâs reported that when the Messenger of Allâh (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him) felt distressed, he would
say:
| |
“Lâ ilâha ill-Allâh al-‘Azîm
al-Halîm, lâ ilâha ill-Allâh Rabb al-‘Arsh al-‘azîm, la
ilâha ill-Allâh Rabb al-samawât wa Rabb al-ard wa Rabb
al-‘Arsh al-karîm (There is no god but Allâh, the
All-Powerful, the Forbearing; there is no god but Allâh,
Lord of the mighty Throne; there is no god but Allâh,
Lord of heaven, Lord of earth, and Lord of the noble
Throne).”
|
Anas
(may Allâh be pleased with him) reported that when the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
was distressed by something, he would say:
| |
“Yâ Hayyu yâ Qayyűm bi
rahmatika astaghîth (O Ever-Living, O Eternal, by Your
mercy I seek help).” |
Asmâ’
bint ‘Umayr said:
|
|
“The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said to me:‘Shall
I not teach you some words which you can say at times
of distress? ‘Allâh Allâh rabbî lâ ushriku bihi shay’an
(Allâh Allâh is my Lord, I do not associate anything
with Him).’”
|
Another of the beneficial du’â’s which the Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) taught us is the
one he told us about when he said:
| |
“The du’â’ of the person who
is in distress is: ‘Allâhumma rahmataka arjű fa lâ
takilni ilâ nafsi tarfat ‘ayn w’aslih li sha’ni kullahu
lâ ilâha illa anta (O Allâh, for Your mercy I hope, so do
not leave me in charge of my affairs even for the blink
of an eye; rectify all my affairs. There is no god except
You)’” |
If a
person thinks about the meaning of these du’â’s and prays
with concentration and a sincere intention, doing all those
things that can help to bring about a response, Allâh will
fulfil his hopes and do the things asked for; He will turn
his distress into joy.
If the du’â’ comes from a heart which is filled with faith,
it will dispel worry and bring comfort. The scholars have
mentioned many stories of people who prayed to Allâh in times
of calamity and distress, and Allâh responded to their prayer
and saved them from an enemy, or from drowning, or from
starvation or disaster. One example is the story of what
happened to the great Sahâbi al-‘Alâ al-Hadrami, who was one
of the most prominent scholars and devoted worshippers, one
of the close friends (awliyâ’) of Allâh whose du’â’s are
answered. During the campaign against the apostates of
Bahrain, he pitched camp, but before the people could settle
down, the camels bolted, carrying away all the provisions of
the army, including their tents and water, leaving them with
nothing but the clothes they were wearing. It was night-time,
and they could not restrain even one camel. The people were
filled with indescribable distress and alarm, and some of
them began making wills to one another (because they felt
that death was inevitable). Al-‘Alâ’ called the people
together and said: “O people, are
you not Muslims? Are you not striving for the sake of Allâh?
Are you not the ansâr (supporters) of Allâh?” They
said, “Of course.” He said,
“Then be of good cheer, for Allâh
will not forsake anyone who is in your situation.”
When the time for Fajr prayer came, he called the people to
pray and led them in prayer, then he knelt up, and the people
did likewise. He started to pray (make du’â’), raising his
hands, and the people did likewise. They prayed until the sun
rose, and the people began to look at the mirages caused by
the sun, shimmering one after another, all the while
fervently praying. When he reached the third [??], Allâh
created a great stream of fresh water beside them. [‘Alâ’]
walked towards it, and the people followed him, then they
drank and washed themselves. Before the sun had reached its
zenith, the camels started to come back from all directions,
bringing the supplies loaded on them, so the people did not
lose anything at all, and they were able to give water to the
camels. This is one of the signs of Allâh witnessed by the
people during that campaign. (Al-Bidâyah wa’l-Nihâyah: Dhikr
riddat ahl al-Bahrayn wa ‘awdatihim).
8. Praying for the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him) (i.e., saying “Allâhumma salli ‘ala Muhammad,”
etc.)
This is one of the greatest ways through which Allâh may
relieve worries:
Al-Tufayl ibn Ubayy ibn Ka’b reported that his father said:
| |
“When two-thirds of the
night had passed, the Messenger of Allâh (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him) got up and said:
‘O people, remember Allâh,
remember Allâh. The first blowing of the Trumpet has
come, and will be followed by the second blowing. Death
has come, with all that it implies, death has come with
all that it implies.’ I said: ‘O Messenger of
Allâh, I pray a lot for you. How much of my prayers
should I devote to you?’ He said,
‘As much as you want.’
I said, ‘A quarter?’ He said,
‘As much as you want, and if you increase it, it will
be good for you.’ I said, ‘Half?’ He said,
‘As much as you want, and if
you increase it, it will be good for you.’ I
said, ‘Two-thirds?’ He said, ‘
As much as you want, and if you increase it, it will be
good for you.’I said, ‘I will devote all my
prayer to you.’ He said,‘Then
your worries will be taken care of and your sin will be
forgiven.’”
|
9.
Relying upon Allâh and entrusting matters to Him
| |
“When a person knows that
Allâh is Able to do all things, that He alone makes
choices for His slaves and runs their affairs, that the
way He runs His slave’s affairs is better than the way
the slave would do it for himself, that He knows better
about the slave’s interests than the slave does, that
He is more able to achieve them, that He is more
sincere and more merciful towards His slave than the
slave is to himself; and also knows that he cannot
progress or regress any further than the limits that
Allâh has decreed for him, for nobody can change the
will and decree of Allâh – when a person knows all
this, he will submit himself to his Lord and hand over
his affairs to Him, throwing himself before his Lord
like a weak slave throwing himself before a mighty and
powerful king. Allâh deals with His slave as He wishes,
and the slave has nothing to do with it. Only after he
has submitted thus will the slave feel relief from his
distress, worries and regrets. He gives the burden of
his needs and interests to One Who is not concerned
about how heavy or great the burden is. Allâh will take
care of it, instead of him, and will show him His
kindness and mercy, without the slave getting tired or
worried, because all his concern is now focused on
Allâh alone. His worry about his needs and interests in
this world has been lifted from him and his heart is
now free of this concern. How good his life is now, how
blessed his heart and how great his happiness and joy!
But as for the person who insists on running his own
affairs and making his own choices, whose concern is
only for his own share and not for his duties towards
his Lord, Allâh will leave him alone with the choices
he has made, so he will be surrounded by concerns,
worries, distress, grief, fear, exhaustion and
depression. His thoughts will be confused, none of his
deeds will be pure and none of his hopes will be
fulfilled. He will gain no respite, and will enjoy no
pleasure. He will never feel joy or contentment. He
will be labouring like a working-animal, with no hope
of gaining anything that could help him in the
Hereafter.”
|
| |
“When a person relies upon
Allâh and puts his trust in Him, he is not controlled
by bad illusions. He trusts in Allâh and hopes for
bounty from Him, which protects him from distress and
worry, as well as many psychological and physical
diseases. Thus his heart gains indescribable strength,
relaxation and joy. The one who is truly free from
problems is the one whom Allâh has freed and helped to
strive against his own-self (jihâd al-nafs) by seeking
beneficial means of strengthening his heart and
dispelling anxiety. Allâh says (interpretation of the
meaning): “And whosoever puts
his trust in Allâh, then He will suffice him…” [al-Talâq
65:3] – i.e., He will take care of everything
that is of concern to him, whether it has to do with
his religion or his worldly affairs.
The person who relies on Allâh is strong in heart and
is not adversely affected by illusions or things that
happen, because he knows that this is a sign of
weakness and fear that is unfounded. He also knows that
Allâh has guaranteed to take complete care of the one
who puts his trust in Him, so he trusts Allâh and has
confidence in His promise. Thus his worries and anxiety
disappear, hardship is replaced with ease, sadness
turns to joy and fear turns to a feeling of security.
We ask Allâh to keep us safe and to bless us with
strength of heart and steadfastness through complete
reliance on Him, for He has guaranteed all goodness and
protection from all evil and harm to those who put
their trust in Him.”
|
10.
Other ways of dispelling distress and anxiety include paying
attention to what is beneficial, focusing on what matters
today and no longer worrying about what may happen tomorrow
or regretting what happened yesterday. Hence the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) sought refuge with
Allâh from worry and regret: regret for things that have
happened in the past which one cannot go back and change, and
worries about what may happen in the future. The slave should
think only about the present, focusing his energy on doing
his best today, because this is what results in perfect work,
and helps him to forget his worries and regrets. When the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) prayed a
du’â’, or taught it to his ummah, he encouraged them not only
to seek the help of Allâh and hope for His blessings, but
also to work hard and strive to achieve the protection they
prayed for, for du’â’ goes hand-in-hand with effort. Thus the
slave will strive for whatever benefits him in his religion
or his worldly affairs, and will ask his Lord to grant him
the result for which he is aiming. He asks Allâh for help,
just as Abu Hurayrah reported: “
| |
The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:‘The
strong believer is better and more beloved to Allâh than
the weak believer, and both are good. Pay attention to
that which could benefit you, seek the help of Allâh and
do not feel incapacitated. If anything befalls you, do
not say, “If only I had done such-and-such, such a thing
would have happened.” Say instead, “It is the decree of
Allâh, and what He wills, He does,” for saying “if only…”
opens the way for Shaytân.’” |
Thus
the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
established a link between, on the one hand, his command to
strive for beneficial things in every situation, seeking the
help of Allâh, and not giving in to feelings of inadequacy
which the harmful kind of laziness, and, on the other, giving
in to regret for things in the past which are over and done
with, and thinking about the will and decree of Allâh. He
described things as being of two types: things which the
slave can strive to achieve either in totality or as much as
he can, or can protect himself from them, or lessen their
impact, by making an effort and seeking the help of Allâh;
and others about which he cannot do anything, so he should
accept them and be content. Undoubtedly, paying attention to
this principle will bring about happiness and dispel worry
and distress.
The hadîth quoted above indicates that one should strive to
eliminate the causes of distress and bring about causes of
happiness, by forgetting about bad things in the past that
cannot be changed, and by realizing that to spend too much
time thinking about such an impossible task is a foolish and
crazy waste of time. So one should try not to think about it,
and try not to feel anxious about the future or imagine fear
and poverty that may or may not lie ahead. We should realize
that the future, whether good or bad, is something unknown;
it is in the hands of the Almighty, All-Wise, not in the
hands of His slaves, and all they have to do is to strive for
the good things and protect themselves from bad things. The
slave should know that if he distracts his mind from worries
about the future and puts his trust in his Lord, then Allâh
will take care of it and his worry and anxiety will
disappear.
11. One of the most effective ways of finding comfort and
contentment is to remember Allâh frequently
Dhikr (remembrance of Allâh) has a wonderful effect in
calming the soul and relieving stress and worry. Allâh says
(interpretation of the meaning):
| |
“… Verily, in the
remembrance of Allâh do hearts find rest.” [al-Ra’d
13:28] |
|
The
greatest phrase of dhikr that can relieve the distress of
death is: “Lâ ilâha ill-Allâh
(there is no god except Allâh).” This is what Talhah
told ‘Umar, may Allâh be pleased with him
| |
: “I heard the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) say a word
which no slave says at the time of death but Allâh will
ease his distress and brighten his colour. It was only
the fear that I might not be able to do it that
prevented me from asking him about it before he died.”
‘Umar (may Allâh be pleased with him) said: “I know
what it is.” Talhah asked, “What is it?” ‘Umar (may
Allâh be pleased with him) said: “Do you know any word
greater that what he told his uncle to say? – ‘
Lâ ilâha ill-Allâh’.” Talhah said, “That’s it,
by Allâh, that’s it!”
|
12.
Seeking refuge in prayer
Allâh says (interpretation of the meaning):
| |
“And seek help in patience
and al-salât (the prayer)…”
[al-Baqarah 2:45].
|
|
Hudhayfah said:
| |
“Whenever the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him) was grieved by
something, he used to pray.” |
When
Ibn ‘Abbâs (may Allâh be pleased with him) heard about the
death of his brother, he stopped at the side of the road – as
he was on a journey – and prayed, following the command of
Allâh.
13. Another thing that may dispel worry is jihâd for the sake
of Allâh
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:
| |
“You must strive in jihâd
for the sake of Allâh, may He be blessed and exalted, for
it is one of the gates to Paradise, and Allâh dispels
worry and distress through it.” |
14.
Speaking about the blessings of Allâh, both those which are
obvious and those which are hidden
Acknowledging them and speaking about them dispels worry and
distress. The slave is encouraged to have the attitude of
thankfulness, which is the highest level he can reach, even
if he is in a state of poverty, sickness or other kinds of
misery. If he were to compare the innumerable blessings that
Allâh has bestowed upon him with the bad thing that has
befallen him, he will see that the distress is as nothing in
comparison to the blessings. When Allâh tests His slave by
means of these disasters and miseries, and the slave does his
duty of being patient and accepting, then the difficulties
become easy for him to bear, and he has the hope of earning
reward from Allâh for submitting to Him, and being patient
and content. This makes bitter things sweet; the sweetness of
the reward helps him to forget the bitterness of patience.
One of the most beneficial things in this regard is to follow
the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him) given in the sahîh hadîth reported by Abu Hurayrah:
| |
“The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:‘Look
at those who are below you, not at those who are above
you, so that you will not think little of the blessings
that Allâh has bestowed upon you.’” |
If a
person keeps this important concept (of looking only at those
below him) in mind, he will definitely feel that he is
better-off than many others when it comes to good health,
physical strength, and provision (rizq) such as food,
clothing, shelter, etc., no matter what his situation. So his
anxiety and distress will disappear, and he will feel
increased happiness and joy in the blessings of Allâh which
have raised him above others.
The more he thinks about the blessings of Allâh, both obvious
and hidden, spiritual and worldly, he will see that his Lord
has given him many good things, and has lifted from him many
bad things. No doubt this too will dispel worries and
anxieties, and bring joy and happiness.
15. Keeping oneself busy with useful work or the pursuit of
beneficial knowledge
This will distract a person’s mind from the matter that has
been causing anxiety. Maybe then he will forget the causes of
his distress, and begin to feel happier and more energetic.
This is something which both believers and non-believers may
try to do, but the believer is distinguished by the fact of
his îmân (faith), his sincerity and his hope for reward when
he occupies himself with learning or teaching something
useful or doing something beneficial. If he is keeping
himself busy with worship, then this is worship, and if he is
keeping himself busy with some worldly work or custom, then
he tries to accompany it with the right intention, and seeks
the help of Allâh to do this thing as an act of obedience or
worship to Him. Thus his action will be effective in
dispelling his anxiety, stress and grief. How many people are
suffering from anxiety and constant feelings of depression,
which result in various kinds of disease and illness. The
right treatment for them was: to forget the thing that caused
the depression and worry, and to keep themselves busy with
some important work. It was important that the work with
which they kept themselves busy was something that they liked
to do and looked forward to; this was more effective in
bringing about the desired good results. And Allâh knows
best.
16. Looking for the positive aspects of the events in which
he tends to see only things that he dislikes
Abu Hurayrah said:
| |
“The Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:‘No
believing man should hate a believing woman. If he
dislikes one aspect of her character, he will be pleased
with another.’” |
The
benefits of this hadîth include: lifting anxiety and stress,
preserving tranquillity, continued upholding of the duties
which are either obligatory or encouraged, and the
achievement of peace between the two parties. Anyone who is
not guided by the Prophet’s words, but does the opposite,
will see only the negative aspects of a situation, and will
be blinded to the positive aspects. So it is inevitable that
he will become anxious and depressed, the relationships
between him and those with whom he is in close contact will
turn sour, and he will neglect many of the mutual duties that
both parties should pay attention to.
17. Understanding the true value and shortness of this life,
and that time is too precious to be wasted in stress and
anxiety
The wise person understands that his true life is one of joy
and contentment. Life is very short, and he should not let
himself get carried away with distress and depression that
will make it even shorter. This goes against the true idea of
life, so he is reluctant to spend too much of his life in
distress and depression. In this regard, there is little
difference between the righteous and the rebellious, but the
believer can achieve this in the best way, in a way that
benefits him both in this world and in the Hereafter. When
misfortune strikes, or when he is afraid of something bad
happening to him, he should also compare the blessings that
he enjoys, both spiritual and worldly, with whatever
misfortune has befallen him. When he does this, he will see
just how much blessing he has, and the bad things will be put
into perspective. Similarly, he can make a comparison between
the thing he fears will harm him and the far greater
possibility that he will be kept safe from it: the faint
possibility that he may be harmed is far outweighed by the
greater positive possibilities, and so his anxiety will be
relieved. He takes into account the most likely scenario so
that he can try to prepare himself in case it does happen,
and he takes measures to protect himself against things that
have not happened, or to alleviate or reduce the impact of
things that have happened.
18. Another beneficial measure is not to allow one’s work and
other duties to accumulate
This means taking decisive action immediately, so that one is
free to deal with whatever comes up in the future, because
things that are not dealt with immediately pile up and are
added to previous work that should have been done, thus
making the burden even heavier. If you deal with everything
at the right time, you will be free to deal with whatever
lies ahead with a focused mind and adequate strength.
You should prioritize your work in order of importance, and
try to choose things that interest you and that you enjoy,
otherwise you will become bored and fed up. You can help
yourself to achieve this by thinking clearly and consulting
others, for one need never regret consultation. Study what
you want to do in depth, and once you are sure about what
action is needed to achieve your interest and have resolved
to go ahead, then put your trust in Allâh, for Allâh loves
those who put their trust in Him.
19. Constantly anticipating and being prepared for all
possibilities
If a person is prepared for the possibility of the loss of a
loved one, the sickness of a relative, incurring a debt,
being overpowered by an enemy, or any other unpleasant
possibility that has not yet happened – whilst seeking refuge
with Allâh and hoping to be safe from it – then if his fears
materialize, their impact will not be so great because he has
already anticipated them and prepared himself to deal with
them.
One important point that we should make is the fact that many
ambitious people are prepared to deal with major calamities
in a calm and patient manner, but they are unduly worried and
stressed by trivial problems. The reason for this is that
they prepare themselves to face major problems, but forget to
prepare themselves to cope with minor troubles, which
consequently cause them harm. The prudent person prepares
himself to deal with both major and minor problems, and asks
Allâh to help him and not leave him to deal with it by
himself for even the blink of an eye. Thus both major and
minor troubles become easier to bear, and he remains calm and
serene.
20. Another remedy is to complain to religious scholars and
ask them for advice
Their advice and opinions are among the things that can be of
the greatest help in remaining steadfast at times of
calamity. The Sahâbah used to complain to the Messenger of
Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) about the
torture they were suffering…
Khabbâb ibn al-Aratt (may Allâh be pleased with him) said:
| |
“We complained to the
Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him) when he was reclining on his cloak in the
shade of the Ka’bah. We said to him: ‘Why do you not
ask Allâh to help us (grant us victory)? Why do you not
pray to Allâh for us?’ He said,‘A
man from the people before you would be placed in a
hole dug for him, then they would bring a saw and cut
his head in two, yet that would not make him renounce
his faith. They would use an iron comb to drag the
flesh and nerves from his bones, yet that would not
make him renounce his faith. By Allâh, this matter will
be completed (i.e. Islâm will be perfected and will
prevail) until a rider travelling from Sana’â’ to
Hadramawt will fear nobody but Allâh or the attack of a
wolf on his sheep, but you are too impatient.’”
|
The
Tâbi’în also complained to the Sahâbah. Al-Zubayr ibn ‘Adiyy
said:
| |
“We came to Anas ibn Mâlik
and complained to him about what we were suffering at the
hands of al-Hajjâj. He told us: ‘Be patient, for there
will come no time but the time after it is worse, until
you meet your Lord. I heard that from your Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him).’” |
So
the Muslim will hear from the scholars and leaders words
which will help him and alleviate his pain, distress and
anxiety.
Similarly, one can also seek the help of sincere brothers,
wise relatives and faithful spouses. When Fâtimah (may Allâh
be pleased with her) felt distress, she complained to her
husband ‘Ali (may Allâh be pleased with him). ‘Abd-Allâh ibn
‘Umar (may Allâh be pleased with him and his father) tells us
the story:
| |
“the Messenger of Allâh
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) came to
visit Fâtimah, but he found a curtain over her door, so
he did not enter. It was very rare for him to enter
without greeting her so when ‘Ali (may Allâh be pleased
with him) came, he saw that she was worried and upset.
He asked, ‘What is the matter?’ She said, ‘The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) came to me,
but he did not come in.’ So ‘Ali (may Allâh be pleased
with him) went to him and said: “O Messenger of Allâh,
Fâtimah feels very upset because you came to her but
you did not come in.” He said, ‘
I have nothing to do with these worldly things and
fancy decorations.’ So ‘Ali went Fâtimah and
told her what the Messenger of Allâh (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him) had said. She said,
‘Ask the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him) what I should do with it.” He said,
‘tell her to send it to Banu
So-and-so.’”
|
(It
was a curtain that was decorated with embroidery and so on).
Going to a man who is wise and has sound opinions can also
help to dispel anxiety.
Al-Mughîrah, the freed slave of al-Walîd, said:
| |
“I entered upon al-Walîd
and found him looking worried. I asked, ‘What is
worrying you, O Amîr al-Mu’minîn?’ He said, ‘The number
of Muslims has increased, and the mosque is becoming
too small for them. I offered them money for the rest
of this church, so that I could take it and add it to
the mosque, to make the place big enough for the
Muslims, but they refused.’ Al-Mughîrah said: ‘O Amîr
al-Mu’minîn, I have an idea that may relieve your
worry.’ He asked, ‘What is it?’ I said: ‘When the
Sahâbah took Damascus, Khâlid ibn al-Walîd entered
through the Eastern Gate, conquering by the sword. When
the people heard of this, they rushed towards Abu
‘Ubaydah (who was laying siege to another gate of the
city), asking him for protection. He granted them
protection, so they opened the Gate of Jâbiyah for him.
Abu ‘Ubaydah entered peacefully, having made a truce
with the people. We should find out how far the
military seizure of land reached, and take it, but the
areas covered by the truce should be left in their
hands. I hope that all of the church will be on land
seized militarily, so that you can incorporate it into
the mosque.’ Al-Walîd said: ‘You have made me feel much
better. Take care of this matter yourself.’ So al-Mughîrah
took care of it; he surveyed the area extending from
the Eastern Gate towards the Gate of Jâbiyah, as far as
Sűq al-Rayhân, and found that the military seizure of
territory had continued as far as a little more than
four cubits beyond the Great Arch, so the church could
be incorporated into the mosque. So al-Walîd sent word
to the Christians to tell them: ‘The whole of this
church lies in the territory which was seized
militarily, so it belongs to us, not to you.’ They
said: ‘Initially you offered us money and land, and we
refused. Be generous and give us what you offered us
originally, so that we may settle this matter
peaceably, and we will give you the rest of the
church.’ So the matter was settled peaceably.”
|
(Al-Badâyah
wa’l-Nihâyah fi Sîrat al-Walîd).
21. The person who is distressed or worried should know that
after hardship comes ease So he should think positively and
realize that Allâh will make a way out for him. The more
intense his stress and depression is, the closer he is to
relief and a way out.
Allâh says in Sűrat al-Sharh (interpretation of the meaning):
| |
“So verily, with the
hardship, there is relief, verily, with the hardship,
there is relief.” [al-Sharh 94:5-6]. |
|
In
effect, hardship is mentioned once, and relief is mentioned
twice, because the definite article (“al”) indicates that the
hardship mentioned in the first âyah quoted is the same as
that mentioned in the second, whereas the fact that relief is
mentioned in an indefinite form (with tanwîn) shows that the
relief mentioned in the second âyah is different from that
mentioned in the first.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
advised Ibn ‘Abbâs (may Allâh be pleased with him and his
father):
| |
“Know that victory (or
achievement) comes through patience, and that ease comes
through hardship…” |
22.
Another remedy for distress is certain kinds of food
Al-Bukhârî (may Allâh have mercy on him) reports that Aishah
used to order talbîn for people who were sick or had been
stricken by tragedy, and she would say:
| |
“I heard the Messenger of
Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him) say:‘Talbîn
warms the heart of the sick person and alleviates some of
a person’s grief.’” |
Al-Bukhârî
also narrated from Aishah, the wife of the Prophet (peace and
blessings of Allâh be upon him) that whenever a member of her
family died, and the women gathered together then dispersed,
except for her family and close friends, she would ask for a
pot of talbîn, then she would cook it, make tharîd [a dish of
sopped bread, meat and broth] and pour the talbîn over it,
then tell the women:
| |
“Eat from it, for I heard
the Messenger of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be
upon him) say that talbîn is the cure for the heart of
the sick person and alleviates some of a person’s grief.”
|
Talbîn is a soup or broth made from flour or bran to which
honey is added. It is called talbîn because it resembles milk
(laban). It is cooked from ground barley.
Saying that it is a cure for the heat of the sick person
means that it relaxes him, gives him energy and alleviates
his grief and distress.
Ahmad (may Allâh have mercy on him) reported that Aishah
said:
| |
“Whenever the Messenger
of Allâh (peace and blessings of Allâh be upon him)
heard that someone was sick or in pain, and not
eating, he would say:‘You
should make talbîn and let him sip it. By the One in
Whose hand is my soul, it will cleanse the stomach of
any one of you just as you wash the dirt from your
faces with water.’”
|
Al-Tirmidhî
reported that Aishah said:
| |
“Whenever any member of his
family fell ill, he would order that soup or broth be
made for them, then he would tell them to sip it. He used
to say,‘It makes the grieving
heart strong and cleanses the heart of the sick person,
just as any of you cleanses the dirt from her face with
water.’” |
Even
though some people might find this strange, this is a true
matter, as it has been proven to be part of the Revelation
conveyed by the infallible Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allâh be upon him). Allâh has created all kinds of food, and
He knows best their characteristics, so the soup of barley
mentioned in the hadîth is one of the types of food that make
people feel better. And Allâh knows best.
With regard to the method of cooking this food for the person
who is physically sick or whose heart is stricken with grief,
Ibn Hijr (may Allâh have mercy on him) said:
|
|
“What suits the sick
person is the water from barley that has been cooked
whole, and what suits the grieving person is the water
from ground barley that has been cooked. And Allâh
knows best.”
|
http://www.islaam.net/display/display.php?part=2&category=3&id=701
DNN
Bismillaahir Rahmaanir
Raheem
____________________
Dealing
with Worry and Stress
Part 3
Writings of Imam Ibn
al-Qayyim on Treating Distress and Grief
by Shaykh
Muhammad Sâlih al-Munajjid
______________________________________________________________________________
Writings of Imam Ibn
al-Qayyim on Treating Distress and Grief
Following this
discussion of cures, we will pause to look briefly at the
list written by Imâm Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allâh have mercy on
him) in which he lists fifteen kinds of remedies through
which Allâh may alleviate distress and grief:
Tawhîd al-Rubűbiyyah (Unity of Divine Lordship) Tawhîd al-Ulűhiyyah
(Unity of Divinity) Unity of belief, i.e. Tawhîd al-Asmâ’
wa’l-Siffât (Unity of the Divine Names and Attributes). To
declare that Allâh is far above mistreating His slave or
punishing him without any cause on the part of the slave
himself. Admission on the part of the slave that he is the
wrongdoer. Beseeching Allâh by the best of things, which are
His Names and Attributes. Among the most comprehensive in
meaning of His Names and Attributes are the Names al-Hayyu
(the Ever-Living), al-Qayűm (the Eternal). Seeking the help
of Allâh Alone. Putting one’s hope in Allâh. Putting one’s
trust in Allâh and handing over all one’s affairs to Him,
recognizing that one’s forelock is in His hand, that Allâh
runs all one’s affairs as He wills, that His command is ever
executed and that His decree is just. Reading Qur’ân and
pondering its meaning, seeking consolation in it for all
disasters, and seeking a cure in it for all diseases of the
heart (i.e., spiritual or psychological diseases) for it
washes away grief and heals his distress and anxiety. Seeking
the forgiveness of Allâh. Repentance Jihâd (striving for the
sake of Allâh). Salât (prayer) Admitting that one has no
power or strength at all, and attributing them to the One Who
holds them in His hand.
http://www.islaam.net/display/display.php?part=3&category=3&id=701
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________
Part 4: Du'â'
(supplication)
We ask Allâh, may He be
exalted, to keep us safe from distress, to grant us relief
from depression and to alleviate our worries, for He is the
All-Hearing Who answers prayers, He is the Ever-Living,
Eternal.
http://www.islaam.net/display/display.php?part=4&category=3&id=701
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Part 5: Reminder
Finally, let us remind ourselves that no matter how great and
how numerous the worries and distress of this world may be,
the distress and anguish of the Hereafter will be far
greater. This includes that which will befall all people when
they are gathered all together for Judgement. Al-Bukhârî (may
Allâh have mercy on him) reported from Abű Hurayrah (may
Allâh be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allâh (peace
and blessings of Allâh be upon him) said:
| |
“I will
be the master of all people on the Day of
Resurrection. Do you know why I will be the master of
all people? Allâh will gather together all the
people, the first and the last of them in one place,
in such a way that if a caller calls out to them,
they will all hear him, and they will all be seen at
once. The sun will be brought close to them, and they
will feel more distress than they can bear. People
will say, ‘Can you see what has happened to you?
Won’t you see who can intercede for you with your
Lord?’ Then some of them will say to others, ‘Let’s
go to Adam…’"
There
will be no cure for distress and anguish on that Day
unless one turns to Allâh today.
May Allâh bless our Prophet Muhammad and his Family
and Companions, who are the best of people. Praise be
to Allâh Who is overtaken by neither slumber nor
sleep.
Muhammad Sâlih al-Munajjid
P.O. Box 2999
Al-Khobar
Saudi Arabia
|
http://www.islaam.net/display/display.php?part=5&category=3&id=701
|